Having
been a bit distracted by the game chef competition (www.game-chef.com
for those that missed it) it has taken me a bit longer to get through
the next batch of six 24hour games. Unless something weird happens,
this should be the next to last set of reviews before the next big
event.
This
time around we have stories of Honour, Discord, Lost worlds,
Uprisings, Fallen Angels and Historical Intrigue… Each in turn
has been particularly interesting for this reviewer, because they are
created with rather different agendas and a great deal of innovative
thought. This lot has a nice high average mark (19 and a bit!).
This
is a review of the next 6 submissions of games received this year. If
you are curious about my last reviews, you will find them by
searching for the name Evan or the number 24 in the reviews section.
At
the time of this writing the coming Grand Act is less than a month
away (the weekend is July 9th-10th, with the Sister Weekend of the
16th and 17th for those who just can't squeeze in the previous
weekend.)
All
the games reviewed here are available for free download from links
available via the www.24hourrpg.com and
http://www.1km1kt.net/24hourrpg/ websites, so check them out if you
are interested.
The
challenge is simply to complete an entire RPG from nothing more than
ideas, your available tools and your own ability within a 24-hour
period. So the work you are looking at here is likely to be short,
sharp and interesting, with a varying degree of polish.
A
few notes on my marking system: 1=Below Average, 2=Average, 3 =Good,
4= High, 5= Excellent. I have on occasion indulged myself and added a
0 and a 6. You can figure what those might mean.
Flavour/Concept:
Outline of the game concept. The score is pretty subjective. I put my
personal opinion of the ideas here.
Formatting:
A bit more objective, this lists the style, structure and overall set
up of the piece.
Appearance:
Again subjective, but with a bit more back up, points are scored for
art, maps, and neat tricks with fonts or colours.
Professionalism:
Spelling, Grammar, Writing maturity, and tone of the work. I have a
bad eye for detail, so scores will not vary much in this one unless
the game does exceptionally well or exceptionally badly.
Completeness:
How easy is the game to pick up and play from what is presented,
how finished does the work feel. Note that "pick up and play"
is subjective. Most RPGs are built with a setting in mind, and what I
am judging here is how easy it is to pick up the info here and run
the game as intended. For universal type games, there needs to be
enough info to allow a GM to pick it up and use it with the info at
hand only in any appropriate genre.
Mechanics:
How appropriate the mechanics of the game are to the game style, how
innovative and clever they are and how easy to use and understand.
All mechanics are judged without play testing, just from a read
through.
Totals:
5/30 F, 10/30 D, 15/30 C, 20/30 B, and 25/30 A.
Note
that most of these categories are subjective, so take my grading with
a pinch or hand full of salt. I have tried to divide the scoring so
that roughly 1/3 of the score is polish, 1/3 is factually relevant
and 1/3 is pure opinion. ;)
Here
we go again!
Ronin
Story
Tony
Irwin
Flavour/Concept:
You are playing an honour bound secret ridden Samurai. The game is a
mish mash of rules from several other innovative systems, and I don’t
think it meshes together as a coherent whole. It has a lot of style,
and I really want to like it but the inconsistencies and lack of
overview really bug me. I fear I have marked this one somewhat
brutally, in spite of some very good concepts, because it falls down
badly in the detail I think it needs. For flavour and concept High
4/5
Formatting:
No Table of Contents, no framing story or concept, just leaps
straight into descriptions of game concepts, then ends with a dozen
pages of schools and abilities. Begins a new page with each topic,
but some ideas seem out of order or poorly explained so makes this a
hard slog. Poor 1/5.
Appearance:
Simple document conversion, nothing to write home or complain about.
Average 2/5
Professionalism:
Writer makes many leaps of assumptions of knowledge, and definitions
of things (e.g. much assumed knowledge from Legend of the Five Rings)
are seriously lacking. Writing style is good in examples and
otherwise, so won’t penalize too much. Average 2/5
Completeness:
Though the length of the work makes it to 24 pages, there are far too
many holes in the definitions, the overview, the lack of character
sheet, and indeed examples of play for the more complex sections
(relationships in particular) for me to give more than Average….
Plus one for the comprehensive 12 page list of powers at the end.
Good. 3/5
Mechanics:
There are some good ways to combine different concepts here, but the
thread is lost along the way. Will coins are meshed with glory coins
toward the end without clear distinction. The lack of clarity and the
reason for some of the rules and indeed explaining the strategy is
seriously lacking. (Why have the limit of the glass of glory at all?
What kind of tokens are put in by the GM under each circumstance? The
reason for the rings to have different values seems arbitrary, and
how do you handle situations where actions make them the same through
addition and subtraction? And so on…). I think there is some
neat thinking going on to mesh these ideas together, but I don’t
think it had the time it needed to manifest the thinking, so I am
going to give a Poor, with the intent of saying “please spend
more time on this, I think it is worth it.” Needs more time
than the 24 hours, so is a failure of scope. 1/5
Totals:
13/30 C-
Discord
Chris
Andrews
Flavour/Concept:
Modern magic, almost thematically identical to Mage: the Ascension or
Kult in basic premise. There is only a little flavour text here, but
a huge swathe of quite interesting system. I think there is an
attempt at limiting the scope but the core concepts need more work
because the body of this offering is overflowing with system elements
and it is easy for the reader to get lost in it all. Plus it is in
serious need of play test (see mechanics below). Still I like the
matching of system to concept, and it is Good work IMHO. 3/5
Formatting:
Cover page, Table of contents, intro story then into the system for
20 pages or so. There is a lot of material here and it is in a
logical order. Some issues with finding rules, as they are not
highlighted or are not explicitly referenced by the section titles
(e.g. the rules about events are in the first magic section, but
there are multiple magic sections). Would have been at least good
with some overview and changing the section names or re-dividing the
sections up again. Average 2/5
Appearance:
Nice cover page but cheated and got a friend to do it, so no bonus
points there. Good title font, nice landscape format, a little untidy
in places with several large blank bits. Nice simple character sheet…
Cut down to Good. 3/5
Professionalism:
Overall good writing. None of it is too hard to understand, and it
takes the time to explain concepts quite well. Occasionally the
writing is a little colloquial, but it is forgivable. The biggest
problem is mentioned in Formatting above, so won’t penalize
here. Good. 3/5
Completeness:
A lot of work has been done here, but suffers a little from failure
of scope as mentioned above. Ready to pick up and play, but not much
is done to explore the game premise and what the characters would do,
so I will shave a point. High 4/5.
Mechanics:
Action is Magic. Magic is manipulating the universe in any way, roll
dice for number of successes (‘effects’) and need to hit
the right number exactly to get the maximum modifiers out of the
situation. Then take these modifiers and apply effects to the
situation. This method should be simple and easy to balance but it
irks me a bit. Some of the basics are not explained properly so I end
up confused. After I have rolled for effects and figured out what
effects I am going for, do I then roll percentile? If not what
happens? If so, what happens? A lot of trouble is put into explaining
how to modify a situation but not enough is put in to explain the
situation itself. Plus I don’t think the effects being a +/-
10% is enough, considering that you will get at most a few effects
each time. Mechanically I think this is a gem in the rough, waiting
to be polished and play tested, but until then it is only an Average.
2/5
Totals:
17/30 C+
Lost
in Smaragdis
Daniel
R.A. Quiogue
Flavour/Concept:
A Lost World scenario… literally. A whole world lost in time
trapped beyond a star-gate of sorts. Adventure in the pulp action
tradition. Sweet. High. 4/5
Formatting:
Begins with flavour excerpts then intro then setting description.
Follows up with chargen and then system. Refreshingly different to
the normal fare, and because character generation is simple, works
well. No table of contents, though. Still Good. 3/5.
Appearance:
Text conversion but real nice font, text box and indentation to
indicate sections. Will be generous here. Good. 3/5
Professionalism:
Very well written indeed. Very impressed. High 4/5
Completeness:
Misses out because of lack of offensive equipment list. As the need
for wounds was written into the system, an offensive equipment list
became necessary. I will go out on a limb and guess this was a
relatively late addition to the rules. Also there is a little thing
about how Hooks help you earn Story Points that is never expanded on,
so no experience system. Still a lovely wealth of stuff so Good 3/5
Mechanics:
Use abilities to get as many d20s as possible then roll them to get
under target number. Opposed conflicts are managed by bidding for
lower targets numbers. This is a simple and neat idea that definitely
needs a play through, my feeling is that there is not enough benefit
to winning the bid on the action target and the bidding does not
exactly allow for the action / counter-action play that is suggested.
This can probably be fine tuned with a play test or two. I like the
simplicity of the stats, using the descriptor system, not original
here but appropriate. Good. 3/5
Totals:
20/30 B
Proletariat:
the Uprising
Gordon
Fay
Flavour/Concept:
Take on the role of revolutionaries in an attempt to bring down the
bourgeois pig-dogs. Written in manifesto and application pamphlet
form, much kudos for style. I like it a lot. High 4/5
Formatting:
Begins with a manifesto, then a recruit section, then moves into game
description and ends with a play example. Nice, but only manageable
because it is so short. I would have expected several pamphlets if
this was released in longer format. ;) Good 3/5
Appearance:
Appears like it was typed hastily in an underground bunker.
Appropriate appearance and clever use of limited resources evident
here. Good 3/5
Professionalism:
Style is in the entire piece. Only a couple of times does it break
voice to elucidate game concepts that don’t really gel with the
manifesto style, a fact that does unfortunately cut in a little into
the mechanics of the piece, but I will reward for here. High 4/5
Completeness:
Very short on rules, and little explanation of the nature of the GM
impinge on what is otherwise a rather cute and very playable
mini-game. I will cut in here a bit because of the shortness of the
descriptions and need for more work on some of the concepts: Average
2/5
Mechanics:
A simple dice under two of three randomly generated stats for action
success, with the payoff in three types of chits. This would play out
quite neatly, except that the GM’s role is in parts assumed to
be in opposition to the players and in parts set up to be supporting
the story without clear definition of the role. Kind of like the
Computer in Paranoia, but not clearly enough stated at which points
they are trying to support the story and at which points they are
trying to win. Plus the Money tokens actually have little to no
value, as they cannot help the players win, and the GM can elect to
not take them. Seems that the game would end in players continually
bidding money, and the GM continually taking only the money bid with
and Power (since that is the main limited and desirable resource. The
bidding aspect of risking a token for an action seems of minimal
value, since any failure of an action costs much more than one token
most of the time. Needs some more balancing here I think. Again
conceptually good, but needs more polish, So Average 2/5
Totals:
18/30 B-
Immaculate
Michael
Walton
Flavour/Concept:
Angels, Saints and Nephelim challenge the forces of darkness and
contend with the complexities of morality in a modern world where god
and the devil exist. In Nomine, with some variance, mustered in 24
hours. I am way impressed. Look, I love the genre and I like what
Michael has done with it, even if it is inspired from or suffers from
convergent evolution with In Nomine. None of it is new systemically,
but the themes and concepts all hang together nicely, and the combat
may be less broken than In Nomine (Sorry SJG In Nomine hit points are
BrokenBrokenBroken)… This is a remarkably complete offering.
Excellent 5/5.
Formatting:
Nice cover picture, table of contents, nice world overview, character
generation, powers etc then system elements then GM’s section.
Careful to control the concepts needed at each stage so as to survive
the read-through test. Done with ease and style. Excellent 5/5
Appearance:
A little plain at times, but excellent art inclusions and well
designed in other ways. High 4/5.
Professionalism:
Well written indeed. Easy to read, friendly, engaging. Good grammar,
spelling and use of language. I will knock off a point because I find
it a trifle too friendly for a system reference, and this is very
much a personal taste thing I will admit. High 4/5.
Completeness:
Only thing missing is a character sheet, it has everything else in
abundance. I mean everything else. I am having trouble shaving the
point for the lack of character sheet because of the abundance, but I
will because I really want it in this style of game. OK maybe a few
examples of play might have been nice… I feel like I am
nitpicking. High. (4/5)
Mechanics:
The system is a bit ‘meat and potatoes’ after all that.
It is basically roll over target to succeed with modifiers. It
integrates together quite well, however, and manages to cope with the
breadth of abilities and powers remarkably well. I am going to give
High for the expert manner that it is all held together, even though
I have tried to reserve the Highs in this area for innovation. This
is really very expertly done. High. 4/5
Totals:
26/30 A
Thou
Spy Hath Embrangled Me
Jennifer
Diane Reitz
Flavour/Concept:
James Bond: The spy that came in from the cold… In the 16th
century, with an neat gender role reversal. Unlike most other entries to date is a single pre-set
scenario with very simple rules for 2 to 3 players, which could
expand into an alternate history yarn with a short stretch. You have
to check out the gadget list. What a rip-snorting brilliant romp!
Excellent. 5/5
Formatting:
No ToC, starts with a GM’s adventure overview section
describing the story then ends with the one character sheet then one
page of system and a game overview. Could do with a rewrite with a
broad overlook in mind, but is short enough that this works. Good 3/5
Appearance:
Nice use of art and font choice. It is a little simple at times, but
is very effective. High 4/5.
Professionalism:
Very well written. The odd moments of grammar stumbling are
forgivable. Captures the language and tone of both the time it is set
and the James Bond genre, which is a feat in and of itself. Includes
excellent support information material and trigger ideas to make me
want to research the period. Could have used a bibliography or
research website list to support the history for any that might want
to know more or where the info was sourced. I think this is important
enough to shave a point from a semi-historical game. High 4/5.
Completeness:
Rather short but hits all the main points needed and is very playable
as it stands for two players. For three-player support the romantic
interest should have had a character sheet in full rather than the
short summary in the GMs section. One rather noteworthy failure in
the system info is noted in mechanics below, and no rules are given
for adding extra characters (not that it needs it for what it does,
so no penalty for this.) High 4/5
Mechanics:
A very simple Roll Under Stat + Skill – Mod on d20 is the main
mechanic, with some resource managed bonus dice to indicate action
point type use. So, while unoriginal, is quick and easy, excellent
for this purpose. Unfortunately forgets to include any explanation of
how to use the damage mechanic (i.e. under what circumstances does
one lose luck, and how much). In such a simple offering a quick
assumption can be made, but this is a serious oversight. Average 2/5
Totals:
22/30 B+
That
was an excellent bunch and no mistake.
So,
into the home stretch now. Only 9 more games to go (at the moment!)
before the next grand act. Need… More… Coffee…
Warm
regards,
Evan
Review Summary