Introduction

I might guess you are asking why is a book on college pranks being reviewed on RPG.net?  That is a valid question and one I will address, I assure you.  The trade paperback If At All Possible, Involve A Cow (IAAPIAC) was released in 1992 and so far as I can ascertain had one print run.  Luckily it is available on Amazon or other fine e-tailers for a reasonable price.  In fact you should be running off and buying this book rather than reading a review about it.  But if you still need some convincing press on.

Material

IAAPIAC covers the gamut of collegiate pranks from the earliest part of our nation’s history until reasonablt modern times (1990’s).  Steinberg doe s agood job of illustrating how pranks have evolved and more importantly why.  He also suggests why the days of pranks are perhaps a bygone thing of the past..  Much of his hypothesis is that pranks happen because there are many creative minds looking for a little fun and usually this is applied to a college or society that is run by curmudgeons.  In other words, stuffy college administrations are asking for it.

Covered in the book are the early pranks, which often involved livestock.  Imagine how much more stubborn, confused and pissed off cow is going to be when the hapless victims try to convince it to go down four flights of stairs.  Other pranks of the early age also involved gun play, theft and lots of breaking of windows.  As the book progresses the pranks get more complicated and sophisticated.  Covered are the Rose Bowl Caltech prank, sending the Harvard Lampoon iconic statue to the USSR and the stacking/counter-stacking of dorm rooms at Caltech.  Much attention is given to the east and west coast schools MIT and Caltech.  Perhaps much of that is they revel in their pranks unlike dour schools between them.

The Geek Connection

Oddly enough with many of the pranks being focused around the brilliant antics of MIT and Caltech many of us might somewhat empathize with those students (or as my wife says only geeks like role playing games…).  More importantly one of the guys involved in the science fiction genre is heavily featured in IAAPIAC.  Jim Mallon was the producer of the long running show Mystery Science Theater 3000 and also did the voice of Gypsy for much of that show’s run.

IAAPIAC covers Jim Mallon and Leon Varijan’s take over of the University of Wisconsin’s student government.  Unlike the lame student governments they did everything they could to waste the student government’s budget on all sorts of goffy things.  Some of these include vast flocks of plastic flamingos on the school lawn, a “submerged” Statue of Liberty on a near by lake, parties and toys for students during registration.  The Pail and Shovel Party lasted for two years, but Mallon and Varijan made the most of it and showed what kind of fun clever planning can accomplish.

The RPG Connection

Ah here is the meat of why I decided to review IAAPIAC.  This book shows that great jokes are carried out with extreme planning and are calculated.  Spur of the moment jokes often come off flat and petty.  Jokes or plots that are built up and planned over time usually come off as more alive and deep.  A few rules from IAAPIAC about pranking I will paraphrase for the RPG environment:

Rule #1:  You actually have to do it.  Nobody cares about a GM who thought about doing something very clever to his group or made it up.

Rule #2:  Think things through.  You have plan and build up to the plot point or trick on the party.

Rule #3:  If at possible, dispense justice.  Dispensing some Gm maliciousness or humor on the party is only satisfying if there is a reason.  Anythign else might be petty or childish.

Rule #4:  People are gullible and will believe almost anything.  If you can keep your composure and not tip off the meta-gamer types at the table you can get away with anything in the process of pulling a brilliant plot, trap or prank on the party.

Rule #5:  Go after those who deserve it..  Picking on a hapless character or one who has done nothing comes off as bullying and abusive.  Nailing that one pain in the ass character is justified.

Synopsis

If At All Possible, Involve A Cow is a hilarious account of collegiate pranks.  It has a good combination of humor and scholasticism by Steinberg that makes the book laugh out loud funny and a captivating read.  Its ties to science fiction fandom and application to running an RPG are mere icing on an already delicious cake.