Hack For More

WEEK 33: 11/23/04

This week, the cast and crew had a celebrity guest star, in the form of Philip "Please Don't Call Me Pip" Stanton, one of the first people I ever gamed with and a (paid!) columnist for starcitygames.com; I'm going to ignore the fact that he writes about Magic: The Gathering on account of our long friendship.

Philip was one of the first people I ever gamed with, and back when I had no friends, he was the victim of all of my poorly thought-out Rifts, Star Wars, and Call of Cthulhu games. Philip has probably lost more characters than any other player who has had the misfortune to game with me. Poor Philip suffered through all of this in silence.

Actually, come to think of it, it's a wonder he didn't discover TCGs earlier.

Anyway, he guested as Brother Geoff, a fourth-level Luvian Cleric who was journeying to his new post as librarian at a monastary, conveniently on the way to Fangaerie proper. I figured it would make for a nice little side adventure while still advancing the plot. (I've been watching Babylon 5 season one on DVD, and they do a lot of that. Very woodenly, granted, but they do it nonetheless.)

Unfortunately, in my clever mapping out of the monastary, now turned into a command post by Orc-Elf forces, I failed to reckon with the party's new mapper: Seth. Seth is a man with many gifts and talents, with several degrees, with a good job, a happy marriage, and a nice home. He is not, however, a man to trust with pencil and graph paper, because he kept asking me all these damn questions. I'm a little fuzzy on cardinal directions. Maybe my brain is non-iconographic (which explains where I get all my extra character points in GURPS), or maybe I'm just pretty dumb, but the player should figure it all out on their own. When Erich did it, I didn't even have to give him distances (one eye=no depth perception=bad choice for a mapper).

Doubly bad, Seth led the players in a righterly direction, rather than to the left, and while the map made perfect sense left-to-right, the reverse was not the case.

The players managed a few skirmishes with goblins, completely missed my Orgs waiting in ambush, and blundered into the boss battle just as Erich became exceptionally sleepy and we all had to go home. Which means...

TO BE CONTINUED...

Puns Are Not A Good Thing:

Ed: It's a Luvian Monastery.
Laura: Do they make blinds there?

Laura: I'm going to name my pony Ed.
Ed: Sel?
Erich: Ivan.
Seth: Ed Sullivan?

Ed: If you guys die this time, it's just because I killed ya'll.

Erich [ala Kindergarten Cop]: It's not a humor.
Ed: Please don't write that down.

Seth [is mapping]: Can you tell me the proper orientation of my paper? Are we on the narrow end or the wide end?

Ed [giving map measurements to Seth]: I used two squares. Do you want me to give you all measurements in squares, Seth? Because I'm not gonna.

Laura: Are you still detecting evil?
Ed: There are a few goblins dragging dead monks away.
Erich: There's some!

Erich: Who designed this temple?
Ed: I did, and it makes perfect sense if you only take left turns.

Topics	Author	Date	Latest Reply
Thank you Ed (1) new	RL	03-22-2005 18:06	03-22-2005 18:06 new
Good Luck and God Bless (1) new	Walt C	03-17-2005 16:44	03-17-2005 16:44 new
FINISH IT! (7) new	[]D [] []\/[] []D	03-17-2005 16:21	03-30-2005 21:28 new
To a Good Bloke (1) new	Jethrow	03-16-2005 21:51	03-16-2005 21:51 new
To one of my favourite columnists (1) new	nihtgenga	03-16-2005 18:39	03-16-2005 18:39 new
Understand & Hope (1) new	Magickone	03-16-2005 10:39	03-16-2005 10:39 new
Good luck & best wishes. (12) new	Jonathan	03-15-2005 07:16	03-16-2005 07:22 new
... just like a real Catholic... (1) new	No2	02-22-2005 14:00	02-22-2005 14:00 new
...you already said that... (2) new	Ian Sokoliwski	02-22-2005 13:36	02-23-2005 06:20 new
A Machine in Search of a Mission (1) new	Ian Sokoliwski	02-14-2005 22:21	02-14-2005 22:21 new
Sorry Ed (36) new	Charlie Dunwoody	02-09-2005 12:59	02-01-2006 02:58 new
Sorry Ed (32) new	Charlie Dunwoody	02-09-2005 12:51	01-30-2006 23:37 new
A few (well lots of) remarks (13) new	Grop	02-09-2005 06:23	02-12-2005 05:22 new
Go to hell (25) new	Charlie Dunwoody	02-09-2005 04:36	04-28-2005 23:58 new
It's like school, only it's not ... (5) new	Ian Sokoliwski	02-08-2005 09:41	02-10-2005 08:50 new
V-day 'projects' (2) new	NotMousse	02-02-2005 01:38	02-02-2005 09:30 new
Let's help with column ideas :) (3) new	Ian Sokoliwski	02-01-2005 23:18	02-02-2005 09:27 new
'Huge Zombie Tank Farm' (6) new	Ian Sokoliwski	01-25-2005 18:42	01-27-2005 08:07 new
Meet the Characters! (1) new	Laura	01-19-2005 09:47	01-19-2005 09:47 new
Why so worked up about a good session? (4) new	Ryan	01-11-2005 13:00	01-12-2005 08:38 new

Hack For More

WEEK 33: 11/23/04

Hack For More

WEEK 33: 11/23/04

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Hack For More WEEK 33: 11/23/04 by Edward McEneely Dec 07,2004	Hack For More WEEK 33: 11/23/04 This week, the cast and crew had a celebrity guest star, in the form of Philip "Please Don't Call Me Pip" Stanton, one of the first people I ever gamed with and a (paid!) columnist for starcitygames.com; I'm going to ignore the fact that he writes about Magic: The Gathering on account of our long friendship. Philip was one of the first people I ever gamed with, and back when I had no friends, he was the victim of all of my poorly thought-out Rifts, Star Wars, and Call of Cthulhu games. Philip has probably lost more characters than any other player who has had the misfortune to game with me. Poor Philip suffered through all of this in silence. Actually, come to think of it, it's a wonder he didn't discover TCGs earlier. Anyway, he guested as Brother Geoff, a fourth-level Luvian Cleric who was journeying to his new post as librarian at a monastary, conveniently on the way to Fangaerie proper. I figured it would make for a nice little side adventure while still advancing the plot. (I've been watching Babylon 5 season one on DVD, and they do a lot of that. Very woodenly, granted, but they do it nonetheless.) Unfortunately, in my clever mapping out of the monastary, now turned into a command post by Orc-Elf forces, I failed to reckon with the party's new mapper: Seth. Seth is a man with many gifts and talents, with several degrees, with a good job, a happy marriage, and a nice home. He is not, however, a man to trust with pencil and graph paper, because he kept asking me all these damn questions. I'm a little fuzzy on cardinal directions. Maybe my brain is non-iconographic (which explains where I get all my extra character points in GURPS), or maybe I'm just pretty dumb, but the player should figure it all out on their own. When Erich did it, I didn't even have to give him distances (one eye=no depth perception=bad choice for a mapper). Doubly bad, Seth led the players in a righterly direction, rather than to the left, and while the map made perfect sense left-to-right, the reverse was not the case. The players managed a few skirmishes with goblins, completely missed my Orgs waiting in ambush, and blundered into the boss battle just as Erich became exceptionally sleepy and we all had to go home. Which means... TO BE CONTINUED... Puns Are Not A Good Thing: Ed: It's a Luvian Monastery. Laura: Do they make blinds there? Laura: I'm going to name my pony Ed. Ed: Sel? Erich: Ivan. Seth: Ed Sullivan? Ed: If you guys die this time, it's just because I killed ya'll. Erich [ala Kindergarten Cop]: It's not a humor. Ed: Please don't write that down. Seth [is mapping]: Can you tell me the proper orientation of my paper? Are we on the narrow end or the wide end? Ed [giving map measurements to Seth]: I used two squares. Do you want me to give you all measurements in squares, Seth? Because I'm not gonna. Laura: Are you still detecting evil? Ed: There are a few goblins dragging dead monks away. Erich: There's some! Erich: Who designed this temple? Ed: I did, and it makes perfect sense if you only take left turns.