Choose which you prefer. The rich tapestry of D&D alignments can produce 9 Batmen, but is trumped by the superior Hogwarts Houses capture of intrinsic human nature. Or, Harry Potter manages to collapse the 9-fold alignments into a tidier 4-fold bundle while retaining all information. It really is all about your point of view-- tautologically so, in fact. Read on.

D&D is famous for its alignments: Good and Evil on one axis, Lawful-Neutral-Chaotic on the other. From the Lawful Good paladin down to the Neutral Evil assassin, you must choose your fundamental stance on how you view reality. Do you obey the rule of law or the call of your heart? Do you care for yourself or for others?

		Lawful
	LG	LN	LE
Good	NG	LN	NE	Evil
	CG	CN	CE
		Chaotic

It turns out you can take any path or role in life and give it D&D alignment flavor. For example, look at Batman for each alignment. Same concept-- vigilante fighting evil-- but covering all 9 alignments as motivational underpinnings.

But 9 alignments is really overkill. It comes down to: you, or others? Means, or merely ends? The Harry Potter series gets it right with 4 Houses that determine the cut of your jib.

		Ends Justify the Means
	Slytherin		Gryffindor
Individual is primary				Needs of the many outweigh the few
	Ravenclaw		Hufflepuff
		Means are Important

Unfortunately, most alignments take a 'big picture' view, a sort of naive morality that looks at the end picture and says "which credo won?". Any fine discussion of morality has to also consider the long view. In the November arc of Order of the Stick (OotS), a tyrant notes 'Somewhere between "villain of the week" and "good triumphs over evil," there's a sweet spot where guys like me get to rule the roost for years.' Fans of the Keynesian long view can see this Faustian bargain as simply pragmatic. Congratulations, you're a Fantastical Libertarian.

This is echoed in an earlier Cracked article which, eerily, also came out in November. "5 Reasons Bowser Is The Most Successful Video Game Character" points out, among other things, that:

1. Bowser gets to conquer the kingdom whenever he wants
2. Even when defeated, Bowser still gets invited to play with the gang
3. Mario dies a hundred times before Bowser finally gets killed once.

Kind of makes you want to consider being a villain. It's fun to look at fantasy and game morality schemes, remembering that they are still 'just games'. I ran into a real world situation that reminded me 'alignments' exist in our world, too. We were running a 4-slot racetrack for wooden cars. Some tracks ran 'hotter' than others. When a new challenger approached, I'd call out "Challenger gets choice of track".

My replacement arrived. Her policy? "Winner gets choice of track."

Makes me wonder which alignment gods we'd worship, or which house the Sorting Hat would place us.

Until next month,
Sandy Antunes